Fu*k it! (but thank you…I like being fu*ked)

Electricity went out last night and first thing Steve said was “do you think they cut it off?” NO, the whole neighborhood’s off. G overslept because his alarm didn’t get reset so he’s in bed. He snapped at me and said they had tests that might make him go to Saturday school but weren’t important, so he wouldn’t budge. FINE. He’s not getting on the computer today and he will be pissed to the max. He’s too big to force, but mama still rules.  He brought home the typical F in accelerated math yesterday and I cringed. I hate the jump around on his grades. Every one of my kids was challenged in math. He’ll pull a B out at the last minute but it hurts me that if there was some effort, he’d have an A – he and I both know it. He says he’ll work on it.

There is no way we will have $489 by Friday. Tomorrow, Steve can take at most, $300 to the EMC and ask for an extension. If they say yes, I’ll be online. If they say no, I can charge my phone with the cig lighter in the Jimmy to stay in touch with the kids and anyone else who wants to check on me. We’ll have to have a deposit plus the arrears to have it turned back on should it be shut off. I figure Kayla can let Melissa know and she can update BSM. Blah. Whatever. Just another piece of shit to shovel.

Everything else was paid. IRS payment agreement was sent in so BOA can work on the house loan. $50 fucking dollars gone if they decide to grace us with a payment plan and take $41.00 a month automatically from my checking account that I don’t have each month to pay taxes I shouldn’t have owed because I wasn’t working that they decided to hit me up for because they felt like it… and could. 36 months of that to not even scratch the surface of the $5000 they claim we owe for 2004, 2007, 2009, and 2010. Most of which is penalty and interest. I love the Georgia Department of Revenue. NOT!!! About as much as I love BOA. NOT!!!!

So, as whatever happens, happens… I will be sitting in my chair knitting. Can’t you hear me? Knit, knit, click, click, avoid, click, click, click, purl2, kssk, purl1, knit, knit, click, avoid, click, knit, knit, click, click…. goddammutherfuckerknitknitknitknitknitknit….clickfuck…Knit, knit, click, click, avoid, click, click, click, purl2,avoid, click, knit, knit, click, click….

I want to scream.

Great Mother Goddess, thank you for the good stuff. There is good stuff. THERE IS GOOD STUFF!





About Morning Knits

I believe in and practice positive living. I love YARN, music, bird watching, history, gemstones, and gardening. I am passionate about the Earth. I am a true homebody. I said I was Pagan for years to separate myself from a churchy upbringing and judgmental family but I'm not. Funny how things come full circle. I believe it's our responsibility to tend and protect the Earth. I basically do my thing in a quiet, amused way. I believe in the power of my own hands, the energy of combined prayer, and caring for the earth. I attend a Kingdom-focused non-denominational Christian Church. I have 6 kids, all home-born and successfully breastfed. They are all grown. I'm the oldest of 9, daughter of a missionary mother who lives in Kenya, married to the son of a preacher, with 4 spoiled dogs and a rescued cat. Right now, there is small balance after yrs of unemployment. My disability was approved due to degenerative discs, fibromyalgia, and obesity. That last is hard to say. I believe we owe it to ourselves to protect our mental health. It's precious and the one thing we can control. I dislike my own housework and I talk too much. I bought a house in North Carolina and after trying to get my husband here for 6 months, he had a stroke. I'm a two-time caregiver. Steve's got hemiparesis and depression and is learning to walk and trying to use his right side again. It's slow-go.
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