As much as I want to say we are not buying gifts, I still found myself having a stupid crying jag over another special day I can’t afford to get my kid a present. How many birthdays? How many holidays? Christmas last year was his French cd’s from Heather, and a book from Susan. School clothes come from Melissa. I am so thankful…but my kid is a kid even at 16. He wants 2 books. Two study books – I’m taking my change jar and cashing it in for him. That should be just enough. It’s my own fault. I rode with a neighbor to the gas station and got her $15 in gas today so she could get to her mom’s – her husband had hit her in the face again and she had her car packed and no gas money. Sometimes I wonder if the gods send people like that to me because I have promised to always pay my debts forward. I don’t know, but they come to me, and I can’t bear to turn anyone away. So afterwards, when looking at the newly formed wish list on my Amazon account, I started crying. It wasn’t there 2 days ago. G just figured out the books last night I guess. Ah well, that’s my kid. Not much on the want list and as last minute as his mama.
I got all the pages faxed to BOA, again today. If they deny this restructure, we can ask them to reopen the case and claim that the circumstances have changed because of my new part-time job. Small blessings. If nothing else, it’s a delay tactic.
Food stamps and medicaid were renewed through June.
2 friends are sending me some work clothes. Bless them.
Things are on the UP. I don’t know why I am so moody today. I need to just talk to G and explain that our gifts have to wait till the utilities are caught up. He will be disappointed, but he’ll understand. I couldn’t justify buying stamps to send cards when I couldn’t get his books. Sara’s birthday is the 18th and nothing for her either. I’d planned necklaces for her and her dolls for christmas, but her birthday…I’m stumped. If I can come up with something, I’ll try to get it to Kaiha to take to her. 🙂
And then there’s Kayla – Isaac is causing her quite a lot of trouble. His terrible 2’s are running her ragged and her body is not recovered enough for the stress she places on herself. She locked herself in the bathroom to keep from going off on him. I wish I could help her. I know I’ve certainly been where she is.
Anyway…I’m better enough. Shake it off and roll on.